Dan O'Donnell has some fun using nothing but plagiarized quotes to tell the story of how Democratic gubernatorial candidate Tony Evers plagiarized his education budget proposals.
How many plagiarized quotes can you find in Dan's report?
Four score and seven years ago, Tony Evers brought forth upon this continent an education budget, saying “Give me liberty or give me school funding.” That which does not kill education in Wisconsin will only make it stronger, and the only thing we have to fear about school funding is fear itself.
Evers presented the budget to Governor Walker, telling him, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” But Walker responded with, “Go ahead punk, make my day” and refused to adapt all of Evers’ requests. Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and Walker took the road less traveled by.
It’s always darkest before the dawn, however, and Evers pressed on. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. After all, 80% of success is just showing up.
“Ask not what your education budget can do for you, but what you can do for your education budget,” he said, adding, “Fortune favors the bold.”
Educations budgets are like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.
“Show me the money! Mr. Walker, tear down this wall! I’m mad as Hell and I’m not going to take it anymore,” Evers screamed at him. “Do one thing every day that scares you. To fund schools or not fund schools, that is the question. It was the best of times it was the worst of times for our education system. Houston, we have a problem with how we will pay for it. We have not yet begun to fight.”
But Walker was unmoved, saying he shall fight Evers’ budget request on the beaches, he shall fight on the landing grounds, he shall fight in the fields and in the streets, he shall fight in the hills; he shall never surrender.
Necessity is the mother of invention, and when life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. Evers had a dream that one day his little budget will be judged not by the color of its skin, but by the content of its character.
So he decided to plagiarize his education budget.
“Plagiarism is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans,” he reasoned. “I see a shining budget on a hill, and besides, someone else’s work by any other name would smell as sweet.”
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all budget proposals are created equal. Evers figured that plagiarizing one is simply one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.
“I plagiarize, therefore I am,” he thought to himself as he began stealing material. “Read my lips, no new ideas. Mine eyes have seen the coming of the glory of this budget.”
This is the stuff dreams are made of! At least until Walker learned about it.
“To thine own self be true,” he told Evers, and reported his plagiarism to the media. Sadly, though, after reporting on the original story, the media has dropped it, saying “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.”